Wasn't going to write this on here because I was afraid someone would steal it, but I need to get it off my chest.
Once there was a family of buskers: a mother, father and son. The boy's parents decided to cut his left arm off so he would make more money busking.
Understandably, the boy was very distressed by this.
One day, the boy was sitting in the marketplace when a feel-good preacher came along.
"You know, young fellow," the feel-good preacher said, "I believe that having your arm cut off could be a possitive experience. It'll show you what it is like not to have a left arm."
Next another man came along.
"You know, boy, you should use the law of attraction. Just imagine you have a left arm and you'll soon have a new one."
The boy concentrated and imagined himself with a left arm, but all he could think of was a table. Soon, the boy had a table growing out of the stump where his left arm used to be.
The boy tried hard to concentrate on having a left arm, but this time all he could think of was a chicken. Consequently, he now had a chicken growing where his arm used to be.
Then the boy lost the will to live.