WELCOME HOME MARY ANNE
Scene 1
The new house. Richard, Sharon and Mary Anne are standing
outside, in front of the front door.
Richard: Well, let’s open the front door and take a look at
our new house.
(They enter. The house is one big room with a floor of rough
boards. There is an old camp stove in one corner, and some blankets on the
floor in another corner.)
Richard: I don’t get it. The contractor promised he was
going to turn the old barn into a beautiful open-concept house with an island
countertop in the kitchen and a big dining room. He even promised me an herb
garden.
Richard: Well, I didn’t contact a contracting company, as
such. I was in the supermarket and this kind of shabby looking guy came up to
me. He said he’d heard about the fire and he wanted to build us a new house. He
shook my hand, I gave him five beans from the pound I’d just purchased and the
deal was done. I don’t understand. How could this happen?
Mary Anne: I want to check out my room. I assume it’s
through this partition.
(She goes to slide back a partition on the far side of the
room.)
Richard: Don’t open that—
(A herd of cows enters the room.)
Richard: You know that drunk, pot-smoking farmer who helped
us out the night of the fire? Well, in gratitude, I promised him he could use
half our house to keep his animals.
Mary Anne: Why can’t he keep his animals in his own barn?
Richard: Because he wants to hold raves in there.
Mary Anne: Well, where am I supposed to sleep?
Richard: Pull up a blanket and some floor, honey.
Scene 2
The airport. Sharon and Mary Anne are sitting in the
arrivals area.
Mary Anne: I can’t wait to see Dawn again.
Mary Anne: I’ve never met her, but Dawn says she’s really
fun. She works as a birthday clown.
Mary Anne: Yeah, but unlike them, Sunny doesn’t perform as
part of a prison release work program.
Sharon: There they are!
(Sharon and Mary Anne run toward Dawn, Jeff and Sunny. Sunny
has an expression
Of complete sadness
on her face. Mary Anne and Dawn hug.)
Mary Anne: (To Sunny) Welcome to Connecticut.
Sunny: Thanks, Mary Anne.
Jeff: Yo.
Dawn: I’m so excited. I can’t wait to do all the cool stuff
we usually do together.
Jeff: Hey, is that family with all the kids still around?
Mary Anne: You mean the Pikes? Yeah, they’re still around.
Jeff: Cool. We could build a spaceship together or
something.
Scene 3
The new house. Sharon ,
Mary Anne, Dawn, Jeff, and Sunny enter.
Dawn: Wow.
Sunny: It’s like my soul, incomplete and empty.
Sunny: My idea of a perfect house is one that let’s in no
sunlight at all.
Jeff: So, did our old house, like, burn down or something?
Richard: Yeah, kiddo, this is our new house, and you can
have the wall above your blanket painted any colour you want.
Scene 4
A radio plays.
Anncr: Well, kids, it looks like it’s gonna be pretty hot
out there, so, you might wanna find some way to feel less hot or something.
Fade in on the inside of the new house. Everyone is lying on
the floor.
Sunny: Great. A new day so the people of the world can
experience more hatred, inhumanity, war, and environmental destruction.
Richard: So, anyone have any good dreams last night?
Sunny: Yes, I dreamed I was kidnapped by terrorists and
stuffed in a woodchipper.
Scene 5
The pool. Mary Anne, Dawn and Sunny are lying on beach
towels on the pooldeck.
Dawn: This was such a great idea I had for us to go to the
pool. You need a new boyfriend, Mary Anne.
Mary Anne: I don’t know. There aren’t many boys here yet.
Dawn: Look, there’s Cole West. He plays Junior Varsity
basketball, doesn’t he?
Mary Anne: Him? He’s a ninth-grader. He’s like ten years
younger than the guys I usually date.
(Cole West swaggers over to the girls.)
Dawn: Hey. What’s up?
Cole: Me, yo, I’m high on crack.
Dawn: Cool. Well, I’m Dawn, and this (Pausing) is Mary Anne.
She just dumped the old man and she’s on the prowl.
Cole: Hey, didn’t you used to go out with Logan Bruno? He’s
my connection.
Mary Anne: Yeah. I broke up with him so I could date guys
with more money.
Cole: Well, I got a bit o’ cash, some rock left and I just
stole a car out this old lady’s driveway. Whadoya say we cruise around for a
few days.
Mary Anne: Sure.
(They all follow Cole out to his car.)
Scene 6
The Pikes’ house. Mary Anne and Kristy are sitting on the
couch, rum and cokes in hand.
Kristy: So did you have fun in Tijuana with Cole West?
(Jordan enters.)
Jordan: When’s dinner?
Kristy: Well, I’ve ordered a pizza. I don’t know what you
kids are going to have.
Kristy: Gee, we’ve never heard that from any of our
babysitting charges before. (Jordan
exits) What’s the matter? You’re usually the first one to speak up when the
kids give us lip.
Mary Anne: Oh, I guess Sunny’s worn me out.
Kristy: Oh. So, how was Tijuana ?
Mary Anne: Wonderful. I’m hoping we can go back there soon
if Cole can get that manslaughter charged dropped. I mean, what was Cole
supposed to do? The guy was in his way.
(A knock is heard at the door. Mary Anne and Kristy answer
it.)
Pizza Delivery Boy: One medium pepperoni pizza.
Mary Anne: Hey, delivery boy, ever been to Tijuana ?
Scene 7
The movie theatre. Mary Anne, Dawn, Sunny, Cole, Jason, and
Alex are sitting in their seats, watching zombies tear people apart.
Cole: I hope you enjoy this movie. I’ve always thought
chicks liked zomby movies.
Sunny: I can really identify with the huge amounts of
dismemberment and death.
Alex: Yeah, pretty awesome, eh?
Sunny: Yeah, but it looks kind of fake. Why couldn’t they
have used real zombies and real victims?
Scene 8
The Rosebud. Everyone is sitting at a table, drinking
milkshakes.
Dawn: Hey, remember down in Tijuana when we were dancing to
that loud music at that bar?
Cole: Yeah, I thought we’d get kicked out of that ballet
school for sure.
(Sunny sighs heavily throughout this exchange.)
Jason: What’s her problem?
Mary Anne: Oh, she gets like that from time to time.
Scene 9
The house. Everyone is lying on the floor, under their
blankets.
Mary Anne: (To Dawn and Sunny) Are you guys up yet?
Dawn: Come on over.
(Mary Anne throws off her blanket and crawls over to Dawn
and Sunny.)
Sunny: Hey, Mary Anne, we were just talking about you and
Cole.
Mary Anne: Right. About that—
Sunny: He is so _not right for you. I thought he was at
first, but now I can tell he’s not.
Mary Anne: What—
Sunny: I know it might be hard to cut him loose, especially
since he seems to have access to lots of good drugs. I know how you are about
hurting people’s feelings. But we’ll figure out some way for you to let him
down easily, or failing that, I know some guys who can get either you or him
out of the country for a while, whatever you prefer.
Mary Anne: Sunny, I—
Dawn: Forget it, Mary Anne. No matter what you think,
Sunny’s made up her mind.
Sunny: So, anyway, you’ll dump Cole. Okay, okay, you don’t
have to _dump him. I’ll call my contacts in Mexico and—
Mary Anne: Sunny, Sunny, I don’t want to go out with Cole
again anyway. I mean, he’s got the drugs and he’s got the car and everything
else, but it’s all from somebody else. If a guy’s not smart enough to have his
own lab and work out his own deals to get cars, he’s not worth dating.
Dawn: Well, that’s a relief. Did you see those two loosers
Cole brought along last night?
Sunny: I know, that Jason was a total Zit farm.
Mary Anne: Yeah, and I could tell by the way Alex was acting
that he constantly gets passed bad rock.
Sunny: Yeah, what loosers. Anyway, those guys are so
yesterday, literally. It’s time for us to move on.
Mary Anne: Move on? Do we have to?
Sunny: Absolutely. What you need, I’ve decided, is an older
guy.
Mary Anne: What?
Sunny: An older guy. Someone mor mature. More exciting.
Someone more-_experienced.
Mary Anne: Oh no. That’s not what I need at all.
Sunny: Sure you do. Believe me, there’s nothing like an
older guy. They are _so romantic, and so much cooler than those
twenty-something loosers you’ve been dating. Like this guy Carson I was seeing
for awhile. He was older, and he was so awesome. We met at the beach. He told
me he used to host a late-night talk show. Sometimes his friend McMann would
tag along. Carson
called him his sidekick.
Dawn: Carson ?
You’re not saying that he would have made a good boyfriend for Mary Anne, are
you?
Sunny: Of course not! But someone _like him. Someone who’s
lonely and close to death and hates all his relatives.
Mary Anne: Sunny—
Sunny: Don’t thank me. And don’t worry about a thing. I know
just what you want, and I intend to find him for you before I go back home.
That’s my fondest wish, to see you with a rich new boyfriend with lots of
connections.
Mary Anne: Well, I’m going to go get dressed. I guess I’ll
see you guys when I come back in the house. Also, Sunny, I’m really glad you’re
feeling better this morning.
(Sunny bursts into tears. The Pike boys enter.)
Together: Yo, Jeff. Time to wake up.
Mary Anne: Jeff’s blanket is over there. He’s probably not
up yet.
Jeff: (Getting out from under his blanket) Yo, where am I.
Byron: Yeah, how do you want your section of wall decorated,
buddy.
Adam: Personally, I was thinking we could just splash the
wall with all different colours of paint.
Jeff: Sounds totally cool. Let’s do it.
(There follows a montage of Jeff and the Pike boys splashing
different colours of paint on Jeff’s section of wall, as well as everywhere
else.)
Scene 9
The house. A knock is heard at the door. Sharon answers it. A delivery boy is standing
at the front door. He looks inside the house, sees the psychedelic colours and
starts tripping. Sharon
takes the tray the boy is holding from him.
Richard: Yuppers. We’ve got lasagna, garlic bread, Caesar
(pronouncing it Kaiser) salad, and chocolate brownies and ice cream for
dessert.
Jeff: Whoa.
(Everyone sits down on the floor and starts shoveling in the
food.)
Dawn: You know what this lasagna reminds me of?
Richard: A package of rubber bands?
Dawn: Yes, but it also reminds me of the time when we were
going to make spaghetti for Mom, and we decided to cook the sauce in the
pressure cooker. Jeff and I had no clue how to work that thing.
Mary Anne: Heck, Jeff has trouble working a doorknob.
Jeff: That I do, bros!
Dawn: So, we were cooking the spaghetti sauce in the
pressure cooker and then Kristy called up to say there was going to be this
last minute fight over me down at the train tracks. So, anyway, I left the
house with everything still cooking and caused a huge fire.
Dawn: No, it was Mother’s Day.
Richard: Then it could have been any night of the week.
Mary Anne: Ah, memories.
(Sunny bursts into tears and runs away from the area where
everyone is eating.)
Dawn: Oh, Sunny’s just upset because we’re sitting here
talking about the good times we’ve had as a family and her parents were recently
killed in a fiery car crash.
Richard: Dawn, why didn’t you tell us about that before?
Dawn: I didn’t think it was important enough to mention.
Mary Anne: I better go talk to her. (She goes over to the
corner where Sunny is sitting) Sunny, it’s me, Mary Anne.
Sunny: Oh.
Mary Anne: What are you doing in my dad’s room? Listen, I
was wondering, I mean, I just wanted you to know—I mean, I don’t mean to pry. I
just thought you might want to talk, you know, about—
Sunny: I don’t want to talk about anything.
Mary Anne: I know it’s hard. Like at dinner. I know how that
can be, watching everybody else be this happy family.
Sunny: Was that not a riot, about the huge fire Dawn caused
in the kitchen?
Mary Anne: (Laughs) Yeah, I thought Dad was going to disown
Dawn and Jeff for sure. (Yawns) Well, I guess I’ll head to bed.
Scene 10
The yard. Mary Anne, Dawn and Sunny are taking turns
swinging on the rusty swing attached to the tree in the front yard.
Sunny: Well, I’ve seen everything there is to see in
Stoneybrook. We’ve been to the pool, the mall, all the bars, the track, and all
three casinos. This isn’t a bad town. But it’s limited. I mean, there are only
so many people here, and so many places to see. There’s only one really good
opium den.
Mary Anne: Chang’s House Of Oriental Good Stuff is a pretty
good opium den for a town this size.
Sunny: True. But don’t you want to see more? Don’t you want
to experience all the exotic alcoholic beverages the world has to offer? Don’t
you want to drink those beverages already familiar to you in a different time
zone? Don’t you want to try bungy jumping on meth?
Dawn: Exactly what are you suggesting? (She doesn’t answer)
Sunny? Tell us what you’re planning.
Sunny: I’m planning something amazing. I’m planning a trip
to the most exciting city in the world. Tomorrow. The three of us.
Mary Anne: I don’t know if my dad will--
Sunny: (Shaking her head) This has nothing to do with your
dad. This is just us. Off to Monty Carlo for a magical six weeks on our own!
And nobody has to know.
Dawn: You mean you want us to sneak off all the way to Canada ?
Sunny: Monty Carlo is in Monaco ,
in Europe .
Dawn: Sunny. You’re kidding, right?
Sunny: Kidding? Why should I be kidding?
Mary Anne: You want us to sneak off to Europe
by ourselves without telling anyone?
Sunny: That’s the general idea. Why is that such a big deal?
Mary Anne: It’s just—
Sunny: You’ve been there before on your own, haven’t you?
With Stacey?
Mary Anne: Well, yes. But we had permission. And a plan.
Dawn: Never mind from whom or for what.
Sunny: We can make a plan. It would be more fun without one,
but a plan is fine. And as for permission—That’s just a formality. I’m sure
they wouldn’t mind. But I want to go tomorrow, and if we ask now, there’ll be
one of those long drawn-out decision processes that parents are always involved
in. They’ll torture us with “maybe” and “we’ll see” and the next thing you know
it’ll be time for me to head back to California .
Dawn: Sunny. Sunny, listen to me.
Sunny: Yes, _ma’am.
Dawn: (Sighing) Look, I’d love to go to New York . It’s a great city, no question
about it. And I’d love to show you all the major landmarks, like the Empire State
Building Ellis Island .
That is a totally cool place to visit. We could even go to the site of the mosk
or chess centre or whatever it is they’re building at Ground Zero. But why
don’t we just wait for the weekend and make it a family trip? I know my mom
would love to go too. Richard always has a good time in the city. And Jeff? You
could walk him around a wheat field for ten hours and he’d think it was cool so
his opinion is of no real concern.
Mary Anne: I thought we were going to Monty Carlo.
Sunny: Dawn, Dawn, Dawn. You know I adore your family.
They’ve been wonderful to me. So don’t take this the wrong way. But your dad’s
an oaf, your mom’s a lush and your brother should be in a group home. A family
trip is _so not what I’m talking about.
Dawn: Oh, no? Then why don’t you tell us what you’re talking
about, Sunny.
Sunny: You don’t have to get all bent out of shape, you
know. Come on, this is about fun.
Dawn: I like fun. Go on.
Sunny: All right. Here’s the thing. Seeing sites like you
were talking about in New York
is fun for tourists. Sure, we could see all the casinos in Monty Carlo and gaze
at the ocean and tour the royal palace and everything like that. Don’t say it.
I know, I’m visiting from California .
That makes me a tourist. And someday I’d love to do all the touristy type
stuff. But what I’m talking about is different. I want to see the _real Monty
Carlo. The Monty Carlo that Monty Carloans, … Monty Carlins, … the people in
Monty Carlo see. Wait a sec. Don’t move.
(Sunny runs into the house.)
Dawn: (Closing her eyes) _What is she thinking?
Mary Anne: I don’t know.
Dawn: Shh. She’s coming back.
(Sunny comes back out into the yard waving a magazine.)
Sunny: Check this out. (Reading ) Come see the seedier side of Monty
Carlo. Where do the down-and-outers live after they’ve blown all their money at
this city’s famous casinos?
Dawn: What does that have to do with any of us?
Sunny: You aren’t listening, are you? If we see the seedier
side of Monty Carlo, we’ll get to meet the real residents of Monty Carlo. The
city is their environment. They know what to do, where to go to have a great
time because they’ve blown their entire fortune living it up. Shopping is a
part of that because they’ll know all the high-end stores where they can’t get
a line of credit, but so are the restaurants where the matre-dis shoos them
away as soon as she sees them coming and the clubs where they always sneak in
and get beaten up and kicked out by the bouncer.
Mary Anne: Clubs? You mean, like, with music and-and
everything?
Sunny: (Pats Mary Anne’s hand) Take a deep breath, Mary
Anne. Don’t worry. I’m not suggesting anything wild here. But wouldn’t you at
least like to sneak a peek at the kinds of clubs formerly rich citizens of
Monty Carlo used to hang out in regularly? Look. It’s not such a big deal.
Tomorrow, as soon as Sharon and Richard make their first run to the liquor store, we’ll head for the airport. We’ll use our fake ID’s to buy tickets, and then we’ll use the people we know at the airport to get through security double quick. We’ll probably be gone for three days before they know what’s happened, and in six weeks, by the time they’ve figured out a plan of action to search for us, we’ll be back in the states.
Tomorrow, as soon as Sharon and Richard make their first run to the liquor store, we’ll head for the airport. We’ll use our fake ID’s to buy tickets, and then we’ll use the people we know at the airport to get through security double quick. We’ll probably be gone for three days before they know what’s happened, and in six weeks, by the time they’ve figured out a plan of action to search for us, we’ll be back in the states.
Mary Anne: How did you figure all that out?
Sunny: I have my sources. (Looking into Mary Anne’s eyes)
Look. I really need this. I’m not going to beg, but it would mean a lot to me
if you guys agreed to go.
Mary Anne: Well, you seem to have subtly convinced me. Let’s
go.
Dawn: Okay. We’ll go.
Scene 11
The airplane. Mary Anne, Dawn and Sunny are on their way to
Monty Carlo.
Mary Anne: What did Stacey say when you told her we were
going to Monty Carlo?
Dawn: She was so jealous! She said if she didn’t have a
sitting job today she’d come with us.
Mary Anne: Gee, that doesn’t usually stop her.
Dawn: Yeah, go figure, eh.
Scene 12
The house. Mary Anne, Dawn and Sunny enter the front yard on
their bikes. Richard and Sharon are standing in the front yard with all their
stuff.
Mary Anne: Monty Carlo was awesome.
Dawn: I know. We should go back there real soon. (Stops her
bike) What’s wrong, Richard and Mom?
Mary Anne: Well, let’s go down to the Rosebud for a big bowl
of strawberry ice cream.
Closing credits.
Based on “Welcome Home, Mary Anne” by Anne M. Martin.
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