(Open on an empty field.)
Anncr: Hi. This is a civil war battlefield somewhere. It was
here that many young men were used as cannon fodder by wealthy men in high
places and that’s exactly what’s happening today when it comes to the battle
many young men face with pornography.
(Shift to a hallway outside a door. Brad knocks on the door.
Professor Harper answers.)
Brad: Hello, Professor Harper. I was wondering if we could have
a casual, non-contrived conversation about pornography.
Professor Harper: Sure, Brad. You know I’m always up for a
discussion, especially if it involves the personal lives of you students.
Brad: Great. (He enters the office and sits in a chair) So,
Professor, is porn bad?
Professor Harper: Yes, Brad, pornography is indeed very bad.
Brad: Is there a big problem when it comes to young men and pornography?
Professor Harper: Oh, there certainly is. So many dudes
struggle with addiction to pornography, it’s something that wrecks dudes lives
so many times.
Brad: (Standing up) Thank you for this, Professor.
Professor Harper: No problem, Brad. You dudes know if you
dudes ever need to talk about anything I’m here for you dudes.
(Brad exits)
(Shift to the college library. Brad and Kevin are using the
computers.)
Kevin: Hey Brad, what are you doing here?
Brad: I have to get some more sources for my history
assignment on antique ice cream scoops. The better question is what are _you
doing here since I never even see you in class?
Kevin: I decided to take advantage of our college’s
technological services to do a little research of my own. Check out this
website. The bitches on here are some of the hottest pieces of ass you’ll ever
see. (Making a rude gesture for Kevin to come over) Come and look, man.
(Brad goes over to Kevin’s computer)
Brad: (Reading) This page cannot be displayed as it violates
the International Library Code of Conduct as regards obscene materials. Looks
real sexy all right.
(Shift to a recording studio)
Joe: Hi, I’m Joe Blow, the lead singer of Genaric Christian
Rock Band 13174. I was reading the companion book to this documentary, which
can be purchased at the same Christian bookstore where you bought this dvd for
only 29.95, while we were making our last record,
“LovewaterfallamazingoceanJesusscarletcordslingshotvolcanoJesus”, also
available at that same Christian bookstore. The book really resonated with me
because I love to watch porn, and I attribute that, in part at least, to not
actually being a Christian. See, I grew up in a Christian home and the only way
my Dad would buy me a guitar for my thirteenth birthday was if I started a
Christian rock band, so I formed the band with some other non-Christian friends
from religious homes and fifteen years later here we are.
(Shift to a church office.)
Stephen Arterburn: The thing about porn is there’s two
problems. First, you have the secular culture where you got porn and beer
commercials and girls in bikinis, and by the way, why is it most the girls that
dress like hoes shouldn’t be dressing that way because they have so little to
show, or way too much in a lot of cases, if ya know what I mean? Anyways, I
guess dudes are a bit responsible for lusting in response to all that stuff,
but they really can’t be held responsible because men are just stupid and like
dogs. It’s not like they can change their thought patterns or anything. Then,
on the other hand, you got the churches where the pastors aren’t talking about
this. I can’t tell you how many letters I receive from both young men and women
who say, “Hey Steve, you know what would be really good? Is if my pastor, whom
I’ve known since I was born, at the church I’ve gone to my whole life with my
parents and all the rest of my family and which also has a large population of
old people, if that pastor would talk on Sunday morning about masturbating to
pornography in front of all those people.” You know, jerkin’ it to porn is one
way to screw up your marriage and your sexuality, but in my opinion an even better
way to do that is to not do anything, not even kiss on the cheek, before you
get married. That way you’ll have no idea what to do, you and your spouse will
be totally sexually frustrated and you’ll get a divorce. Since most women want
security, they’ll re-marry soon after and that way I’ll get to charge the
father of the bride twice for two weddings for the same girl, and who knows how
many more in the future.
(Shift to a teenage girl’s room)
Kelly: I looked through my closet at what I was wearing and
I realized that what they’d been saying at church, as well as what they’d been
saying at the secret feminist meetings I was attending when my parents thought
I was at youth group, was true. Men are just stupid pigs and are like dogs.
They have no intelligence and can’t think for themselves. They see a girl in a
mini-skirt and they immediately want to jump her bones. I realized I was
helping to cause that, even in my brothers because they’ve molested me several
times.
(Shift back to Professor Harper’s office. Professor Harper
is at his desk. Brad is sitting in a chair.)
Brad: So, Professor Harper, I’ve really been studying into
this thing about lust and what the Bible has to say about it. I’ve really been
searching the Scriptures a lot.
Professor Harper: Well, that’s always good to hear, Brad.
After all, you know what Ephesians 5 3 says.
Brad: Yeah, I did a word study on some of the terms Paul
uses in that verse. Fornication comes from one of the Greek words we get the
word pornography from and it refers to lewd sexual acts. I hardly think kissing
your girlfriend is a lewd sexual act.
Professor Harper: Well, Brad, you still have to consider
Jesus’ own words in Matthew 5 28.
Brad: Yeah, I looked at and thought and prayed about that
one a lot, too. He said that whoever looks at a woman and lusts has already
committed adultery whith her in his heart. That’s some pretty powerful stuff
right there.
Professor Harper: It sure is.
Brad: The word adultery comes from the same Greek word
that’s also translated as fornication and refers to extramarital activities,
and lust is wanting something you shouldn’t want or shouldn’t have, so it seems
to me what God was really saying was that a married man shouldn’t fantasize
about sleeping with another woman, and you could say a man also shouldn’t
fantasize about sleeping with a married woman. That seems different than
finding that woman jogging by attractive.
Professor Harper: Now come on, Brad. Every guy has a problem
with lust and pornography. It starts the day a boy is born.
Brad: Oh, it’s a serious problem, all right, for a lot of
guys. But there are still a fair number of men who don’t look at that stuff.
Professor Harper: Every Christian man I’ve known has
struggled with these problems.
Brad: Well, maybe part of that problem is so many Christians
not seeing people as people, not seeing people the way Christ sees them. We
tend to look at people as those who are in our camp or aren’t, and even if
they’re in our camp, we have to make sure they fall in line. So, it’s no wonder
so many young Christian men view women as sex objects. Maybe if they saw them
as people the problem wouldn’t be so rampant.
Professor Harper: I’m calling your parents. Pack your
things. You’re expelled from this Christian college.
(Shift back to the recording studio)
Joe: One thing I’ve found that helps me with my porn
addiction is devotions. Every morning I read three chapters of my Bible, pray
for 15 minutes and read an entry in a devotional my denomination approves of.
Now, the entry in the devotional is pretty pithy, I spend most of my prayer
time trying to concentrate rather than actually praying, and I can’t understand
my Bible, I guess cause I’m a guy and I’m thus really stupid, but at least
during that time I’m not watching “Porn in the Morn” on channel 74.
(Shift back to Kelly’s room)
Kelly: What I would say to a teenage boy is look past a
woman’s beauty today because she’s not going to look like that forever. You
know, because of the pressure society puts on women to look good, and more
importantly because of the pressure the church puts on a woman to be the
perfect wife, mother and servant of the Lord, when that woman gets old before
her time and becomes a nagging shrew and bitch, you’re gonna need some hobbies,
my friend, so start developing them now.
Anncr: There are several solutions dudes can employ to deal
with their addiction to pornography. First, I recommend praying basically
formulaic prayers using words you don’t know the meanings of and which you
would never use in real life. Second, spend time in God’s Word, by which I mean
being spoonfed little bits of the Bible in church or a Bible study group.
Third, but certainly not least, I’d recommend either joining an accountability
group or obtaining an accountability partner. That way, you can share highly
personal details about your sex life with guys you barely know from church in
the public setting of the local coffee shop, be constantly nagged about your
sexual purity even though you don’t really want to change, and, best of all,
find out about pornographic materials you never even knew existed.
(Shift to a classroom. Pastor Football Coach is standing at
the blackboard with a piece of chalk in his hand.)
Football Coach: Now, to help you dudes understand addiction
to pornography, I am going to draw some football plays. Now, if you don’t like
football, then get out of my classroom, girly man. Now, for the rest of you,
(drawing), this play right here is known as the stupid dude play. This play
occurs on the football field when a dude is stupid and looks up pornography.
Now, this next play is called the poorly drawn stick figure play, and that (His
phone rings with “A Mighty Fortress.”) Pardon me, just let me quickly take
this. (He pulls the phone out of his pocket) Hello. … I can’t talk right now,
Marvey, I’m right in the middle of a class. … Well, why don’t we just heat up
the leftover kalamari and manicotti from when Lance and Julian were over last
night. … I don’t wanna listen to Streisand again, put on the Judy Garland one …
The playlist I made for you on your last birthday, don’t you remember? … Look,
I gotta get back to teaching here. … Yeah, yeah, love you, too. (Turning back
to classroom) Now, if any of you out there can’t understand these football
analogies I’ve presented, there’ll be a couple of army colonels along shortly
who can hopefully explain it better for you, and if you’re a pacifist, well
then go back to Hippyland, nancyboy.
(Shift back to Steve Arterburn’s office)
Steve Arterburn: I just really wanna tell you my favourite
story if I could. There was a couple attending my marriage classes one night
when I was talking about purity. After class, the man confessed to his fiance
he was having a problem with pornography, mainly “The Price Is Right” models
and Maxine Waters pictures, and she just tore a strip off him. She said, “Well,
I may be in as much carnal, animalistic lust with Brad Pitt as what you’re
doing, but nevertheless, I’m not going to stand for this. If you don’t stop
doing this right this very microsecond, the wedding is off. What’s more, I will
tell everyone we know, including your employer, about this, and I will also
spread the false rumour to all those people that you like to wear women’s clothing.”
So that really motivated him to get control of this, and now they’re married
and she says he’s just the greatest hamster you could ever hope to have as a
husband. I got a call from him the other day and I thought, “Oh no, he’s
fallen. I’m going to have to examine whether this wonderful system my brilliant
mind came up with is faulty, and I’m going to have to examine myself and where
I went wrong in life, but luckily I didn’t have to do that. Instead, the call
was this man saying he wanted me to dictate to him how to raise his children, as
well as how to carry out every other major and minor decision in his life and I
felt really good about that.
Anncr: God’s standard is different than the world’s
standard. God’s standard is perfection, which none of us can a chieve apart
from taking on the righteousness obtained for us at the cross. However, who
wants that. We can become acceptable, if not to God, than to ourselves and our
fellow church-goers simply by employing some strategies veiled in Biblical
terminology and dreamed up by men who are in leading positions in today’s
American Christian culture who don’t have to live in the real world. Sure, a
truly Godly way to fight this thing would be to ask God to renew your mind so
that you could see women as people and not sex objects, the way Christ Himself
sees all of us. However, we’re confident you’ll be perfectly content to settle
for less, still seeing women as sex objects, but acting really self-righteous
and holier-than-thou when people point this out to you. So remember, don’t rely
on the Lord, get out there and win the battle, all by yourself.
Based on the dvd “Every Young Man’s Battle”, companion to
the book of the same name by Stephen Arterburn.
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